Wrapping Up

Parents waiting to meet up with their children at the end of testing.

I finished teaching last week. I said goodbye to my students. I turned in my grades. I packed up my stuff. And I left. It felt surreal.

Part of me feels triumphant for finishing the year. Part of me wants another year to be a better teacher, improve my Chinese, and continue the relationships I've started with students and teachers alike. Part of me can't wait to go home. Part of me is sad to leave.

What will I miss?

• First and foremost, my students. A few exceptions aside, the students have been sweet and eager to learn. A few students even cried when I said I was leaving. I'll particularly miss our after-class interactions when they'd ask me questions or just talk to me.
• Teaching, especially figuring out how to present the material clearly. I love that look on their face when they have a realization.
• My friends in China--cofellows, other TFC fellows, and local teachers--and the camaraderie.
• Feeling (occasionally) fluent and bilingual.
• The gorgeous scenery that surrounds me daily.
• Ersi, the rice noodles that are a specialty of Yunnan.

What will I not miss? (Yes, I fully realize that some of these things are inevitable flip sides of the things I'll miss.)

• The inability to plan and the futility of even trying.
• The constant game of trying to cajole and threaten students into staying on task. And each having an English notebook (never mind writing in it).
• Never being able to express myself fully and clearly.
• It taking forever to go anywhere, see anything, or visit a friend.
• All the smoke, noise, crowds, etc. (I was on a bus the other day and people were pushing their way on to the bus before anyone had gotten off because they were worried there wouldn't be enough seats.)
• The littering, spitting, urinating, and defecating in public places.
• Everything being hot-and-sour flavored. I like spicy. I like sour. But does everything have to be hot and sour?
• Duty weeks where work starts at 7 am, doesn't end until 9:30 pm, and requires even more yelling at students than usual.
• Having no personal space outside of my own room.
• The Great Firewall.

And then, of course, there are all the things I'm looking forward to. Being home. Snuggling with my cats. Seeing you.